Wednesday, February 24, 2010

Hurling abuse

Someone has to tell me why men are so fucking annoying. SOMEONEJUSTHASTO! I get it that you are a different part of the species. I get that, I do. But why the fuck did god decided to make you as a collective of jackasses? WHY? You're idiots. You're more women that most women I know. In fact, PMS is a syndrome you invented just so we'll understand why you fucks get all anal.

There is someone I know, have for the last 5 years actually. He's turned out into the mother (not father because mother's are a little more awe-inspiring) suck-up-spineless-chooths I have seen in my life. To the point where, if his chaluness will make me and the rest of the team look like a bunch of inefficient dumbasses then he'll do it.

DUMBFUCKANDAHALF!!!

I hate hate hate people like that. You have a point, make it. You have something to say, say it. Don't hide behind your stupid computer monitor playing FIFA '08/'09 whatever and then pretend to be part of a discussion you've started just so you can be part of a conversation. Don't sneak into the boss' cabin to say something that involves the entire team when you can send out a group email. Sneaky ass kissers should drop dead. I hate them.

Most sneaky ass kissers I've known have been men. I hate sneaky ass kissers. I hate men.

Sunday, February 21, 2010

Trying to remember

I want to want to write about what happened on Friday night. But I can't because I don't remember. What I can remember is that Rs800 got stolen from my wallet while I was retching my guts out in the loo at Taj Coromandel and my watch is missing and I spent most of the evening doubled over near some corner throwing up!

The next morning, when I woke up at my friends house, it was like nothing ever happened. Sigh.

The same thing happened to me the night of my 25th birthday. It all began after the Tequila shot at Pasha which I will avoid henceforth. No more tequila for me!

I wonder though, if the boy I'm going to marry, whoever he is, reads this, will he want me? Or will he say, "FINALLY, company for all my stupidity"! I hope he says Finally! I know I don't want to be married to some stiff, bore who thinks I'm a lunatic because I talkalot...

Marriage, my 25th, feminism are posts that need some time and effort on my part.

I need to sleep. God knows, I have a nonsense week ahead of me!

Sh

Wednesday, February 17, 2010

Not being able to

A friend of mine asked me something on G-chat today. "Are you writing these days?". My answer was pretty straightforward, no. There was a point of time, a couple of years ago, when I would write. A thought in my head would be written down somewhere, either my spiral bound notebook or typed out and saved on the computer. These days, that has stopped. I know that it has something to do with the fact that I write for a living. As much as I want to think that journalistic writing is a different genre and if one is really creative then it will all happen, I can't shake off the fact that I don't write anymore.

I want to be writing. Regularly. It used to be my thing. My need to say what I was thinking. My need to perceive things I was going through so that I could understand it better. A need, pure and simple! These days, all I can think of are slugs/titles/blurbs/introductions/lengths of quotes/picture options/co-ordinating with freelancers/etc. Rather painful. With all this in mind, it is really hard to think of a way in which to put a thought creatively. All I can think of is venting. I can't think of a single thing to write that will get past the dimension of 'realism'! I want to write again. Makes me sad that I'm not, that I don't. Sigh-ness!

Sh

Sunday, February 14, 2010

Valentine's Day

Valentine's Day. It's the one day in the year that I want to curl up and die. I do. This day has been unkind to me for 25 years in a row. No kidding. Not once, never, as a matter of fact has someone done something remotely nice for me on this day. Which is why, over the years, I have grown to be a lot more indifferent to everything that it represents. Simple.

I love a little romance from time to time, but to have it all on one day is fuckall. Simple. So, today, I said let's go out. I collected three other single women I know and went to Zara's for lunch. Zara's Tapas Bar is the only place in Chennai that you can go to as a group and have a blast. It's not meant for a date OR a night on the town. Just meant to go, sit, drink. Zara also serves a mean lunch, like I've mentioned before. However, no combo lunch today. I mean Valentine's Day and all that we were expected to pay. OK THEN...

We began our day with a morning show of Valentine's Day. I really enjoyed the movie. It was fun to watch on a Sunday morning with girls I like. However, because I woke up so early this morning and slept so late last night, by the time lunch was done, I was ready to sleep! :P At lunch, we were in our element. Loads of talk about everything. Loads of talk about men. Loads of nonsense about the girls at the next table who were drinking at 1pm like it was going out of style. You know the "Look I have elbows aaaaaaa" type. They were doing shots! SHOTS AT 1pm!

What hit me was this. Everyone seems to have a common dislike of Valentine's Day. It is the one day in the year that people are all forced to think about love and what it means to them whether they like it or not. It's like someone's pressurised you to think about love. When you are being forced into a corner, then you obviously don't like it. Despite this, we try to bring out our most romantic sides and make someone we care about happy. For the most part, this day is about that one smile that will tell you everything you need to know. That will answer your doubts about feeling the emotions you're feeling. When that moment happens, then the rest of the year is sorted I think. For the most part. At least you know that the person you are with is with you for a reason.

That still doesn't take away the fact that this is a day that has been unkind to me over the years and I absolutely refuse to acknowledge it. Even if I do find "someone special", I refuse to be sucked into the commercialised bullcock that Valentine's Day has become.

I can't say more really.

Sh

Sunday, February 7, 2010

5 sentences!

for some strange reason I feel like shit. Looks like finally, finally A's prediction is true. I'm depressed. It had to happen I think.

I'm not sure why. I'm not sure who's fault it is. I'm not sure why I do this to me ever so often.

Now, I'm not even in a mood to blog about it...

Sh

Saturday, February 6, 2010

Friday night

Saturday, February 6, 10.45am. I have a tiny hangover. I drank rum after a long time. I went to Zara's after a long time. I had fun with a group of people after a long time. Until yesterday, all my nights out have been with my tiny clique of 3! Just Pooja, Seema and me (I rhymed that purposely. fuckall choothaandi tactics). Last night, after work, a few of us from office just headed out drank nice things, danced while sitting cross-legged on the seats, hugged a lot, took some hazy, in-the-dark photos, confessed to having a big crush on the new girl in the team, ate really spicy egg curry and dosa after. hugged summore and went home!

heh. Just a post-event coverage ya!

Sh

Thursday, February 4, 2010

Tings I want to say

I've been thinking. I don't talk much about everything. I mean, all I can do is just rant and use my vocabulary and whatnot to make a point. But I don't talk. Half the stuff I blog here is a little insignificant. My insights are not detailed by the experience behind them. It's a little unfair I think. I think in that sense I am a little Indian and a little prudish. The thought of dishing cyberspace with my nefarious, behind-the-cupboard activities makes me a tad bit uncomfortable. Especially because I'm terrfied people I know are going to read it. I do not want the look of knowledge in the eyes of people I know. I sure as hell do not want people thinking that my sexuality and my awareness of it and my satiation of my needs is any shitting excuse to come and touch me!

There are things about me that I'm happier knowing exclusively. I do not want half the world privy to information about me. I know that this attitude is completely contradictory to the fact that I am a journalist and that my job is to serve it to the world straight but people will just have to deal with it right?

Think I just wanted to get it off of my chest. I'm reserving a post here for man-bashing. But that is for the weekend. When I have the time to type more.

Sh